by Chris Widener
Now
you may ask why we would write an article about developing better
relationships. The reason is because I believe that those who are in a
relationship will be significantly and directly affected in all areas of
their life by how that relationship is going, and how healthy that
relationship is.
Research has proven that those who are happy at home are more
productive and less stressful at work. Developing a better relationship
with your mate can help you develop a better life and a better business!
Here are some thoughts to chew on for developing a strong and healthy
relationship with your mate.
Listen.
Communication is the key to a lasting relationship and listening is
the key to communicating. Too often when we are quiet we are not
listening, but waiting to speak. Instead of listening to what our mate
is saying, and intently trying to understand them, very often we are
making mental notes of what we would like to say in response. This is
particularly true for us males. We often are trying to find the weakness
in our mate's argument, rather than really listening to the words that
they're saying and the manner in which they're saying it. Why not take
some time this week trying to internalize and understand your mate's
words and feelings?
Schedule a regular time to go out or spend time together.
With today's busy lifestyles, it is too easy to put our relationships
on the backburner and take them for granted. While we might have every
intention of spending regular time with our mate, we often find
ourselves driven by a schedule that has us running in every direction
and leaving us little time for our most important relationships. Work
gets in the way. The kids get in the way. Our hobbies get in the way. We
need to realize the value in the importance of that relationship with
our mate and its effect on our total life. Then we need to make spending
time with our mate a major priority by scheduling a specific time at
least each week to get alone together, talk, and simply renew our
relationship. Be sure to set some time aside each week to rediscover
each other and enjoy your time together. Pencil it into your schedule
and don't give up that spot. In fact, it is probably best if you and
your mate sit down and decide what night will work each and every week,
then put it into your calendar. If someone asks you if you're available
at that time, you tell them you already have an appointment. In the long
run, that time that you spend with your mate will help you to become
more of a success than you could ever mention.
Consider your mate's interests more important than your own.
When each person has decided to give of themselves to the other, you
form a reciprocating relationship of love, concern, and devotion. When
you come to a place where you disagree or where the two of you have
differing opinions, try to get to the point where you can consider what
your mate likes as more important then what you would like to do. The
simple decision to do this goes a long way toward developing a healthy
relationship!
Learn your mate's love language.
There is a lot of talk recently of love languages. What this is, is
that each individual has certain ways they receive love from other
people. Some people like to have time spent with them. Others like
gifts, small or large. Still others respond best to personal touch. And
others appreciate verbal affirmation. Our tendency is to show love the
way that we like to receive love, but what will recharge our
relationship fastest is to find out what way our mate likes to receive
affirmations of our love. To next time you get a chance to speak to your
mate, ask them which of the above ways they like best to receive your
demonstration of love. Then make a conscious effort to begin showing
your love to them in that manner.
Do the small things you did when you first fell in love with your mate.
Do remember when you were first in love? Remember the small things
you did show your love to your mate? But as time went along, you
probably began to get weighed down with simply living life and forgot
the small things that made the difference in the beginning. Things like a
phone call in the middle of the day just to talk or say "I love you,"
an appreciative note, flowers, gifts, and opening doors. Re-charge your
relationship by consciously going back and doing the small things that
you did when your love first began to grow.
Forgive.
I've done a lot of work with couples were having troubles, and one of
the most common elements I find that is working against the development
of their relationship is that they are holding something against the
other and they aren't willing to forgive. The fact is that your mate is
going to fail you from time to time. We need to understand that. What we
do when we get to that point however, is what will make all the
difference in the world. In a relationship that is going to last, the
people involved are committed to forgiving one another. Those who's
relationships last longest, and will be the healthiest, are those who
are committed to forgiveness.
I hope these thoughts are helpful to you in recharging your love
relationship. I truly believe that if we will put these principles into
practice we will see our relationships grow in ways they never have
before, and that in turn will make our whole life better.
Source:madeforsuccess.com
No comments:
Post a Comment